[code"> [/code"> Courtenay Brown: Advice Please

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Advice Please

Massage-therapist JD had to go on VACATION for the past month (how selfish!) so I have resorted to (1) rolling around on a lacrosse ball on my living room floor to get out the knots, and (2) looking to other people for laughs.

(2) has gone a little better than (1)... See below.


One email response I got to my Vineman blog post, specifically the part about '...monstrosity, run by the Ironman corporation which as far as I can tell is the Clear Channel of the sports world that has created a huge machine to take people's money whilst making them feel like Winners because they get to spend all sorts of money and get finishing medals in exotic locales such as Santa Rosa and Cancun...'

Anyway, the email:
exactly. this is why i hate tri. you forgot lake placid, germany, brasil, canada, and the infamous kona- the so-called 'world championships'. funny how the number of 'spots' for kona equals almost exactly the number of athletes willing to pay for and participate in 2-4 ironman events during the year in order to 'qualify'. it's a fucking scam. actually no, it's fucking genius. i only wish i'd thought of it first...


I find this hilarious. And yes I am still planning on throwing my money in the direction of Cancun and thus feeling like my own personal Winner etc...

*************************

A guy friend called me yesterday. He wanted advice.

Him: Court, how do I make a move on a girl without being retarded? Do I like, sidle up to her on the couch and just, you know, kiss her?

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Him: Stop laughing at me! I am serious!

Me: Sorry. Um. Seriously? Well don't act like a turtle and spend 15 minutes inching closer to her by millimeters and then ask if you can kiss her or something.

Him: Really? I want to be smooth but I don't want to be an asshole. How do I do that?

Me: Well just act natural and confident! But by the way have you even asked her on a second date yet?! Start by calling and asking her out again and then call me back and we'll come up with a plan. I have to work.


I confirmed certain advice nuggets with my sister. If anyone has anything to add please let me know. I do think this is a worthwhile topic because some dudes are totally unsmooth and need help.

**********************

Driving back from the race on Saturday:

Greg:... so what do you think?
Me: Huh?
Greg: What do you think about those two options?
Me: Oh I don't know. I guess I was totally spaced out.
Greg: Hahahaha! You were! Ha! How cute, you were spaced out!
Me: Hmpf.
Greg: Hahahaha!
Me: Yeah well now I am ignoring you. And I am totally focused on it!

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8 Comments:

Blogger Gilby said...

I'm too short on cash to see my massage therapist right now, so I too have had to resort to the ball. Except it's a tennis ball--and not even a real tennis ball. It's a chemical-mint-scented breath-freshening faux tennis ball for dogs, which is all the convenience store had.

10:29 AM  
Blogger Courtenay said...

haha!

yeah i sort of lied.

technically mine is this rubber band ball that's about the size and firmness of a lacrosse ball. i got it for free at work, it was some gimmick that came in the mail!!

problem is it sheds rubber bands and pinches my hair sometimes. oh well.

10:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

don't know your religious views, but FYI tri-california (wild flower, pac grove, treasure island, etc) is sponsored by a christian organization. not good or bad, just important to know where we put our money.

http://www.tricalifornia.com/trinity/
http://www.fcaendurance.org/MinistryIdeas.lsp
http://www.ictrinet.com/
http://www.stepuptolife.com/Pages/main.htm

10:47 AM  
Blogger Lorri Lee Lown -- velogirl said...

guy advice here. forget the couch. if it's a 2nd date, pick her up at her house (or somewhere neutral) and at the end of the date, drop her off again. then, you have the perfect opportunity to kiss her (ie the end of the date), avoiding the awkward moments on the couch.

or, if you're feeling really ballsy, start the date with a kiss. tell her you want to avoid all the awkward moments of anticipation during the entire evening and get the "goodnight kiss" out of the way first.

12:12 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

GUY ADVICE:

it sort of depends on WHO the guy is and WHO the girl is and what the situation with their friendship history is, if you know what I mean.

BUT if he plans to kiss a girl at the end of the date, he should test the waters throughout the evening. get a little touchy-feeling-but-not-in-a-perverted-way and see if she seems to like it. Give her a compliment but don't overdo it. Then when you're going to go for it, GO FOR IT. Sitting around and waiting is for sissies.

this is all coming from someone who has been on all of like 3 dates in her entire life. sort of.

2:02 PM  
Blogger Goodwyf Allie said...

My girls think you can't kiss till you're engaged. . .no kissing means more talking--always a good thing!

4:49 AM  
Blogger Unknown said...

you could be like those girls who pledge their allegiance to their fathers and not kiss a boy until post-marriage. And then once you're married you can let out all your backed-up horniness issues and end up with 17 kids!
awesome!

9:06 AM  
Blogger norcalcyclingnews.com said...

boo!!!

i loved that deleted post.

damn Lieto ... always spoiling the fun.

1:27 PM  

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